“if i fall along the way
pick me up and dust me off
and if I get too tired to make it
be my breath so I can walk.”
- matchbox twenty, “bent” (songwriter: rob thomas)
i just literally almost picked up my laptop and threw it across the room for being uncooperative. not exaggerating. and i may yet before the night is done.
i am having what i like to call a “matchbox twenty night.” matchbox is my favorite band, but i have a tendency to *start* listening to them in fits of random frustration. if you’ve ever listened to the lyrics of more than a couple matchbox songs, you get this. so when i decided i also needed to write tonight, it got me thinking.
this is maybe one of the two toughest stretches of my life so far. i have four major problems right now. first, i’m on a newfound search for some job security. second, i have to move in the next couple months. (did i mention that looking for/at apartments is quite possibly one of my least favorite things ever?) third, i’ve got to reestablish my social life, which fell apart sometime after i started teaching part time, working full time and managing the band. the fourth is not fit for public discussion, but let’s just say it’s very much something i work on every day. and so, in keeping with me trying to be positive, this is not a sob story, it’s just a reflection, with a request.
this started as an experiment when i was really bored last night. i was curious, i’ve had my new ipod since, oh, around the beginning of this year (which means all my playcounts reset): what am i listening to the most? originally i was just gonna list the top 10 or 20 most played songs and let people make of that what they will. but then i realized that, though the list was for the most part predictable (a lot of jimmy eat world, gaslight anthem, arcade fire, and yes, american idol artists), there were some surprises.
so here it is: for 2011 thus far, the most surprising songs of my itunes top 50 “most played”:
2. taylor swift, “fearless”: a few weeks ago, i went on a kick where i listened to pretty much nothing but this song for a week-ish straight. and apparently that kicked it to my number 2 most played song. it is the only taylor swift song i own and i make no apologies that i love it.
7. jimmy eat world, “anais”: to be fair, their most recent offering is disproportionately represented in my top 50 (6 songs) because it’s one of my favorite albums AND was released late 2010. this is a demo track they threw on at the end. it’s not even remotely the best song on the album. but for some reason i’ve attached to it. maybe it’s the raw simplicity.
11. kris allen, “falling slowly”: from american idol season 8. what surprises me about this is that it’s my most played “idol artist” song. granted, david cook’s stunning finale performance of collective soul’s “the world i know” (which is one of my all-time favorite things ever in the history of my music consciousness) isn’t far behind, but i’m surprised that kris allen makes this list before david cook.
15. abe west, “pretty easy”: self-indulgent or just indicative of how awesome these guys are? (answer: yes.)
23. matt nathanson, “come on get higher”: i don’t get it. did i leave this song accidentally on repeat one night? i mean, it’s good, but i don’t remember ever, say, having a week where i was obsessed with it. (see: swift, taylor.)
38. fall out boy, “tiffany blews”: initially i was surprised that this was the highest ranked FOB song in my library but then i thought back, and i can actually pinpoint the exact moment when it became one of my favorite FOB songs. one of those “when you associate a song with a memory” moments. so it’s surprising, but i get it. (see: nathanson, matt.)
43. matchbox twenty, “how far we’ve come”: you have to get to 43 before you find a song from my favorite band on this list??? huh. okay. then again, i do have a tendency to listen to them when i’m “in a mood” so maybe that’s a good thing. (ps - the above link is to an incredibly awesome live acoustic version of this song that i really think you should check out.)